after sem break

its after sem break again
cny is just so SHORT
and i hate it so much...!!!
i dun have enough time for everything
not enough visiting to relatives and friends' house
not enough dating with hubby
not enough red packets
not enough time for gathering
everything is just so not enough

i dun even wanna pack my luggage back here
this time coming back
all are t shirt only
lazy to care how i look
lazy to think what to wear
lazy to make the appearance to look better just to make others happy
lol
those are fake
fake Fake FAKE people
dun they feel tired applying make up every morning before class
if class at 8am
means they nidda wake up at 6am
zzz
and its so thick till the tone of colour is different

eventually
mood sucks
daily
this is the 2nd day back to ums
its only 2nd day
and i'm filled with things to do
sobz
and of course
my homesick problem did not turn better
the first step i walked into my room
after my roommate left
tears immediately rolled down
thinking bout home
thinking bout my family
thinking bout him
these 2 days
emotion are not that stable yet
can really just cry very easily
whenever i think of home
whenever i text him
makes me miss him more
today i even cry behind of my class
hope nobody knows as i try to be silent already
i cried on bus
i cried on the plane
ya call me a crying baby
i admit that
at least
its better than hiding inside right?

sigh~
this is a tough sem
a real tough one
hope my emotions are controllable
to face everything
i dun hope results drop
make everyone dissapointed
they put so much hope on me
i can feel the stress
i can feel the burden
i can feel the hope they put on me
will i let you all down?
i duno
i'm sorry if i did
i've tried my best

*pens off*

thinking ways
to find other attention
to distract my attention
from you
i'm sorry
for being annoying
i'm sorry
for being useless